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Welcome! Any newcomer or member struggling with compulsive gaming is welcome to post here. We encourage you to post an introduction and ask for help.

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Joined: Thu Dec 08, 2016 4:14 pm
Posts: 4
State/Province/Country: CO, USA
Hello everyone,

I am a 32yr old male who recently came to the conclusion that I was addicted to computer games and I am currently on my 8th day of sobriety. Gaming had been just a hobby of mine throughout my entire life and so it was difficult to finally come to a place to recognize and admit I had a problem. The hobby turned to an addiction around 2 years ago when I was diagnosed with a chronic illness that had no cure and found out that the illness had affected me since I was 10-11 yrs old. I felt like my entire life so far had been cheapened by an illness that would also limit my future. A few months after that I lost my grandmother who was one of the most important family members in my life. During this time I had moved away from family to attend college and was forced to deal with all of these feelings alone. Looking back I can see the time I spent playing video games started to escalate and take over more and more of my time and sleep. Luckily I was dedicated to graduating and so the addiction was limited by school. I was able to be a functioning addict you might say. I graduated about a year ago and with the new free time I needed to use to find a job, I instead spent gaming more and more and ended up putting myself in over 24k in credit card debt. I also ruined a 2.5 year relationship with my girlfriend who is the love of my life. The more I spent playing games the more my life fell apart, which led to me wanted to escape even more into games. Now that I am starting the recovery process I am not having cravings, but the flood of emotions I had been avoiding are overwhelming at times. I am trying to only focus on staying sober and finding employment right now, but reflecting on the things I have damaged and need to set right has been a constant distraction. I am looking forward to having a community to talk to about my addiction.

Wed Dec 14, 2016 12:15 am

Joined: Sun Oct 02, 2016 4:52 am
Posts: 3
State/Province/Country: Queensland, Australia

Big hugs to you. Sounds like you've been through a lot. Hopefully your sobriety will give you the chance to get back on track again. Don't rush into full-time employment if you can avoid it - in many people's experience early sobriety is filled with relapse and can be very difficult. Focus on that for now.

Hope to see you around in meetings. Congratulations on taking that first step :)

Wed Dec 14, 2016 12:50 am

Joined: Sun Dec 04, 2016 9:17 am
Posts: 3
State/Province/Country: Nederland
Hi Spiker! Congratulations on taking that first step and coming here, and welcome!

I can relate to what you say about being a functioning addict. I've been a 'functioning' addict for several years, which was a blessing and a curse at the same time. My studies always came first, I attended social activities and sport clubs and seemed a friendly guy. From the outside, everything seemed fine. However, when I was on my own, gaming and internet use would take up ever bigger and bigger chunks of my life. And since I was functioning pretty well, I was able to hide it for over 6 years, from others as well as for myself.

Good luck and take care.

Wed Dec 14, 2016 9:19 am

Joined: Sat May 17, 2014 3:06 pm
Posts: 968
Location: Charlottesville
State/Province/Country: Virginia
Welcome Spiker, glad you found us here. I can relate to your story plenty. Stress and emotional pain drove my gaming, and it increased over time, hurting my relationships with my wife and kids. I wasted thousands of dollars playing.

Yeah, early recovery is hard. Emotions come back, and without gaming I had to deal with them. Numbing them out and trying to run away was not working.

The meetings were a life saver for me. I needed a lot of contact with other people going through these things, or who had gone through them, and needed to know there's light at the end of the tunnel. I needed support and company and accountability in staying off games and making positive changes, and I found it here... so grateful for this fellowship. Glad you're here.

Thu Dec 15, 2016 12:54 am
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Joined: Sat May 17, 2014 4:59 pm
Posts: 680
Location: Colorado (Front Range Urban Corridor)
State/Province/Country: Colorado, USA
Thanks for sharing your story, Spiker. I can relate to it, and I'm sure others can as well. Congratulations on getting clean and finding us.

The fellowship is an incredible group of people who support each other to abstain from video games. I've gotten so much help here and made so many connections. It's kept me off games for four years. There's hope, for sure.

The big action around here is at the meetings. We have 2 every day, most days 3. I hope to see you at one soon.

Things will get better for you, but it's pretty rough at the beginning. Don't be alone in it.

Welcome to the fellowship.

You have to go the way the way your blood beats:
If you don't live the only life you have,
You won't live some other life,
You just won't live any life at all.

I was dan1 in a former life.

skype: dan939f
reddit: DansNewLife

Thu Dec 15, 2016 10:42 pm

Joined: Thu Dec 08, 2016 4:14 pm
Posts: 4
State/Province/Country: CO, USA
Thanks everyone for the warm welcome.

Sat Dec 17, 2016 2:51 pm
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